I’ve been working on posting as many of my short stories as possible the past couple of weeks, and it’s been quite enlightening on several levels! But on one particular level (so far) it was surprising how many times I visit the dream world. I mean, yeah, I knew I did that (obviously…I did write the danged things), but I apparently did this quite frequently! And not only that, but I also tended to use a particular phrasing a buncha times in different stories…so I changed them.
As I post these things, I’ve tried not to do much editing. No, they’re not all great, or even good, and some will be and are downright bad…but I want to put them out there. For the stories. Where I “was” when I wrote them. I’ve toyed a couple times with updating them to present times—and I may have taken such liberties once or twice—but on the whole I’ve decided to leave them as-is, albeit to lessen my sometimes heinous overuse of commas.
My God, the humanity!
I really must revisit my grammar guides.
As much as I love the work I’ve done, love these stories, I wouldn’t claim them masterpieces or anything, but they bring me back to those “halcyon days” (if I might use the term) of my earlier writing. I’ve had great bursts of creativity and productability! They’re ideas and concepts that were near and dear enough to me that I had to write them. And it’s fun to see how my writing has improved…the directions it’s taken…where it’s gone. I’m amazed where my mind went in bringing these stories to light! In surprisingly many instances I don’t even remember the exact endings anymore—and in all cases they pleasantly surprised me!
Wow, I came up with the twist?!
That was actually me who wrote that?
Another curious area I’m reconnecting with is the warping of time.
When I was thick into all the passion of my writing, I literally used to feel time warp around me. There were many times when I truly felt I’d written more than was physically possible within the physical time I spent writing said material. And since going back to these stories, I have begun to feel that warping of time once again—I’ve so missed it, and I love feeling it again!
It’s also been fun bringing to light some insights into the stories themselves. What inspired me, where something was originally published. In one story, “Red Hands,” that I’ve readied for posting for March 4 of 2016, I wrote it after I learned about a real (and understandably terrifying—perhaps “horrifying” would be the better adjective in this case) incident in another’s life. It’s also the first story where I used the real names of all involved, including myself (that was weird writing about myself), because all were (still are?) public figures…but I did ask all involved and they said I could do so. We’ll see if the story ends up that way.
But revisiting all these stories has me revisiting my roots. My interests. This Other Me who still resides in all these stories. This Other Me who still lives “back then” in the worlds and dreams where these stories are strongest…and they are strongest at the “point of power” of their creation. And since I’m “one of those nut jobs” who believes there really is No Time…just our corporeal perception of “It”…that All Time is Now…I really love getting back in touch with that Other Me…still out there…still feverishly creating these stories I’m revisiting and reliving….
This Other Me is still hot with the fire of writing and hot with the hope of getting published by the Big Houses. Hot with the fire of burning the world with my imaginative genius…not to the ground—just pleasantly singed.
The Other Me.
Still alive out there in “the past”…still writing like one possessed little bastard….
This Current Me…don’t get me wrong…he loves where he is, he really does…loves his life and what he’s made of it…he has no regrets whatsoever…but like when anyone has had a great vacation…a great life…and they fondly look back on it…they smile. Their heart feels good. Their soul. It’s not so much about wanting to go back and live in the past…it’s just about looking back and feeling good about where you’ve been.
You just feel damned good about your life. What you’ve accomplished. Who you’ve become.
My life feels like a life properly tempered by the flames of my passions…my desires. My efforts.
I’d like to say that it’s where you’ve been that makes you who you are…but since I don’t believe in Chronological Time that doesn’t quite work, does it?
I believe where you’ve been continually helps create who you are, because I firmly believe that who you are is where you are in the moment. That “point of power” I mentioned earlier.
I am firmly in my present by visiting this Other Me in other regions of my life, is perhaps a best way of putting it.
I am reinforcing who I am by visiting who I was, in your terms.
So, as I revisit my previous work…and who I am in those Past Pages…I am reconnecting with my passion…my dreams…my writing roots. There really is no Time…no Past, no Future—only the Eternally Present Now. So, if you are able to revisit Another You in another focus, you can tap into that person. That passion. You can help bolster the both of you. Change the Past…make it better. You can help Other You by reinforcing his or her energy, which, in turn reinforces Current You.
When I started revisiting all my stories I had none of this intent. I merely wanted to revisit my older work. Wanted to do something with them. After all, they weren’t doing anyone any good where they were: hidden. “Forgotten.”
Well, in truth, I’d never forgotten them. They are my children…
And you never forget your children.
So all of this Deep Thought stuff kinda hit me (and is still hitting me—I still have many more stories to post!) as I reread and reworked these things. Warped Time.
If you follow my reasoning about the illusion of Time, then you can see that there really is no death…only a change in focus…not unlike what I’m describing here. The dead are still alive and vital…we just have to find them—and some of us would rather not do that. Even some of the dead feel that way.
But the dead’s existence does not depend upon our views of them—or does it?
Of course, you have to buy into my reasoning to see any of this…but that’s what a much of my work is about: getting you to buy into my reasoning.
As I said elsewhere, my goal is to get all of you to walk away from my fiction thinking: “Yeah, this could happen!”
So I go where some of you would prefer I not tread. I visit with the dead.
Do the dead dream?
This I can unequivocally tell you:
They do.
Related Posts
- Dark Was The Hour (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- The Coming of Light (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- The World’s Greatest Writer (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- The Death of Me (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- Tail Gunner (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- Do The Dead Dream? (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- Short Stories (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
- Voice (amazon.com)
- Psychic (amazon.com)
- ERO (amazon.com)
- The Uninvited (amazon.com)
- Sleepwalkers (bookstore.authorhouse.com)
Wendy Brydge says
Firstly, “Do The Dead Dream” would be an awesome title for a book or story!
It’s fun to revisit old things that we’ve created, isn’t it? An old piece of writing or an old painting does tell a lot about the person we were at the time. I’m glad that you haven’t been editing your stories (at least not a whole lot!) as you post them, Frank. Years ago, my dad said something to me that really stuck. Not even sure why it affected me so much, really. But I took an old completed painting and was “fixing” it. He told me to stop. He said that if you go back and change what you’ve already completed, then you’ll never have an accurate picture of how you’ve improved. At the time, I just wanted to make it better. I could see so many areas that with some tweaking, would have made that painting so much better. But he was right. A lesson learned is a lesson learned, you know? No matter what avenue of life you’re talking about. And it’s good to be able to go back and reflect on that. If I couldn’t see how “bad” my paintings were at one time, then how could I properly appreciate how far I’ve come? How my style and technique has evolved? What would make me continue to strive to get better every day? It IS fun to sort of play “spot the difference” with yourself. Everyone needs encouragement to succeed, even if it’s simply SEEING how you’ve gotten better at doing something. So the day he said that, I made a new rule for myself: Once I sign a painting, it’s DONE. I won’t go back to it in a 5 years, 1 year, 6 months, or even next week, and make changes. The signature is the seal.
“If you’re not happy with how a painting is, do it again,” my dad said to me. “But don’t change the one you already have. It’s part of your history now.” And while that’s not always the easiest rule to follow, I DO follow it. So as with the more important things in life, learn from your past so that the future can be better, while never forgetting that when tomorrow gets here, it’ll be “today”. 🙂
fpdorchak says
Very insightful of your dad!
I’m so glad you took his advice…because there is a beauty to these old works that can be hard to explain to one not familiar with the “mechanics” behind it, perhaps. To those who always want “bright and shiny.”
BTW, if I can ever get my act together with these shorts, that is exactly the title I’m going to use! :-] I’m hoping to compile all these into a book in the next year or so, so thanks for the vote of approval and enthusiasm! :-]
Wendy Brydge says
Cool! 🙂
Karen Lin says
You are a workhorse of a writer. Amazing how much you’ve written over the years and all of it interesting–beyond or deep inside–humans and humanity. Some of your fiction I’d rather walk away from saying – man I hope that CAN’T happen! What’s with the snow falling across the screen now?
fpdorchak says
Hey, Karen! Thanks for the oh-so-kind words! :-] Yeah, I wouldn’t want some of the stuff that happens in my work to come about, either! I also really think it’s about time to collect this stuff into a book, so I think I might keep this momentum going and try to do just that in the coming year….
The falling snow is a “gift” from WordPress. From ~Dec 1st to Jan 4th you can configure the snow to fall on your blogs. I love it!