Yesterday I came across a site where the author of that site described himself as “failed” in endeavors that were obviously important to him. It automatically got me to thinking about myself and others…those of us who haven’t “hit it big.”
I felt for the guy.
I read further, and among his other descriptions, “daddy” was mentioned.
Okay, people, and here I do speak from experience (not the “daddy” part): read the title of my post today. Take it to heart and internalize this mantra. I don’t care where it came from nor who is credited with saying it first (but, hey, thanks, Jason Nesmith!), just live and breathe the words Never Give Up and Never Surrender!
Persist.
I started writing when I was 6. I’m freshly turned 51. Yes, I’m published in a few places (even internationally), have a self-published work, and yes…am still writing and trying to sell “that one” that some publisher will feel s/he can sell and take me under their wings. I also come to find (thanks to WordPress’s end-of-year analysis) that my blog posts are read worldwide (Canada, UK, Europe, Asia, Africa, Australia…). Years ago someone asked me (in a roundabout and polite way, the more I think about it), why I kept going to writers conferences and have not been picked up.
Simply?
I don’t believe I’m a failure and I just don’t give up.
Ever.
Persistence is the key. Believing in yourself is the key.
Yeah, and the alternative is not acceptable.
There are many parts to everyone’s existence, a part of mine is to write. Other parts are to learn patience, to learn to better interact with others, to better create my reality, and on and on. Life is multifaceted. Internalize that one, too. Look at it this way: if your other “many parts” to your existence did not involve your art…how much more miserable do you think you’d be?
Exactly.
So, why not use this “other part” of you…be it writer, athlete, parent, whatever…and enjoy that personal superpower of yours. Enjoy just flat-out doing it.
Enjoy the journey.
Just because your work–whether it be an up and coming athlete, artist, or parent–doesn’t get worldly recognition, doesn’t get published, or your kids didn’t “turn out right” doesn’t make you a failure. All you can do…is your best.
Now, there are many reasons out there for why a thing is or isn’t working for you…but does that really matter? Your belief systems are where you’re going to look for that answer, I can’t tell you how to deal with that–that’s just another part to your personal existence, but to this other stuff, of considering yourself a failure, I can say…if you have an ability use it. If you’re an artist, draw and paint…a writer, write. An actor, act. Just because others seem to be “more successful” than you is background noise. Don’t compare. Everyone, and I do mean everyone has their own issues. We all put on faces to the public (anyone outside yourself), for good or ill. Chose your “face” wisely, and have an optimistic, positive outlook on life.
Be happy.
I know there is a lot of evil and angry out there, but if there was more evil and angry than happy and positive we wouldn’t be here, now would we? And if you genuinely have a depressive mindset, please, get that looked into. But try to focus on the positive. Try to create more good and positive with your actions.
Create.
Enjoy your creation.
Persist.
Never give up and never surrender!
Thanks… I needed that. Sometimes I think we all do.
My pleasure, glad I could help, Chuck–and cool website Gravatar, too, BTW! Thanks for stopping by, and best of success to you and your work!
I believe it was the great (fictional) show Galaxy Quest that gave us those fighting words, “Never give up. Never surrender.”
Good words, thanks.
Thanks, Chris! Another also pointed that out to me. I should try to link to it….
Well said oh wise one! Good for you, and you know me, I will hold you to those words. Keep up the good work.
The Phil
Yeah, baby!
Regarding “other parts” and belief systems… I also believe these things are at the root of our inner turmoils. As you continue to not give up and not surrender, here are some tools that may be helpful…
In my experience as a chiropractor/healer, it is very hard to “muscle through” a belief (change it via conscious mental will power, as with affirmations). It is easier to deal with a belief in its own language: emotion…
Turmoil is created when the “mental” conscious mind (what we desire) conflicts with the “emotional” subconscious mind (our “other part”; the home of our belief systems). To “heal” (make these two aspects congruent) we need to dig under the conscious mind. This is a learned skill, that is more about emotional “honesty” than mental “will power”.
Our beliefs are based on emotional programming from our pre-intellectual, vulnerable and impressionable youth. Knowing this gives us an edge. Be vigilant to negative feelings. If something comes up in your life that makes you feel like a “failure” — dig into this feeling to discover its roots. When the original cause of the negative feeling is remembered, forgive and be done with the circumstances — this allows the pent-up energy to move out… and you will find that your perspective on things is changed. Above all: don’t identify with negative feelings — this is just information passing through your mind.
A good introduction to this process (generically known as “energy psychology”) can be found here (but there are many versions that work):
Free Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) manual:
http://www.eftfree.net/get-the-eftfree-manual/
Thanks, Chris–another avenue for people to try!
That’s absolutely right. The second novel (or the tenth or the fifteenth) might be the one to hit it big.
I wouldn’t, however, encourage that attitude toward having children. 🙂