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F. P. Dorchak

Speculative Fiction (New Weird) Author

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Fun

Tina S. v. Eddie V.

May 26, 2013 by fpdorchak

Wow.

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  • 14-Year-Old Girl Destroys Van Halen Guitar Solo (mashable.com)

Filed Under: Fun, Leisure, To Be Human Tagged With: Eddie Van Halen, Tina S., Van Halen

Going Indie—What I’ve Learned (So Far)—Part 3

May 22, 2013 by fpdorchak

The Indie learning curve continues!

While I don’t feel as harried as I did the past couple weeks, though there are still things to do and learn and do better next time. And I still have to promote…more. I’m looking forward to it all!

Okay, so, here’s some more learnin’:

  1. Update on the B&N account thing: check your frigging JUNK MAIL. And if you use Outlook, check the frigging JUNK MAIL in your host e-mail account funneling into Outlook.  Sheesh. Yeah, I kept checking the Outlook account, but not the host account. It sat there for almost a week. When had it been approved? The 15th. Same day I requested it. <insert “funny words” here> I went in and updated everything…and it still has to get approval, but this time it says (once book content is uploaded) it could take up to 72 hours. So, hopefully, by Friday, The Uninvited will be available through Nook for $3.99 (still free one more week at Smashwords). Man, lots of “Uninvited” books.
  2. Nook’s cover file:  they limit the image to a maximum of 2 MB. Thanks, Cover Girl, Karen, for getting me that so quickly. :-]
  3. Update on updating the KDP version of Uninvited: yes, that is how it looks when updating—it looks exactly like you’re starting over, but the already uploaded version remains available, and the changes go through smoothly and there’s no reason to have to change your shorts.
  4. Found a great post interview on Susan Brooks’ blog, with Smashwords Marketing Manager, Jim Azevedo (thanks, RMFW loop and Susan for posting this!).
  5. This was kinda cool: Amazon has author pages in other countries (duh), and asks if you’d like to input some author info there. The countries offered were France, Germany, and the UK. This is my US author page. Now, My German ist sehr rusty, et moi Français even more so, which is how international incidents start (my French is non-existent, except for words and phrases like fromage and voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? And no, I’m not asking the latter. See, that how’s international incidents start…), so I like to use an online translator, like Babylon 10, for extended foreign text beyond memory and my French and German dictionaries. So, well, I didn’t read all the Amazon Terms of Use in French and German (though I did glance at and recognize some words, but that and a quarter’ll get me slapped), so I hope I’m not getting screwed in these countries and the Terms are the same as the US version. Man, even the UK’s version was hard to read. Anyway, I took my main author page, plugged it into Babylon 10, and voila! Insérez la traduction ici! Don’t know about all the dashes in the German one, if I get time, will look into it, but the German one looks, you know, kinda right (dashes notwithstanding). So, if anyone’s fluent in Deutsch und Französische Sprachen, I’ve presented the three versions below.

Thanks, again, for stopping by!

English:

F. P. (Frank) Dorchak grew up in New York State’s Adirondack mountains. He attended Northern Arizona University, in Flagstaff, Arizona, then entered the U.S. Air Force. He performed Combat Crew duties in missile warning and satellite operations, at Cavalier AFS, North Dakota, and was a GPS mission controller and Crew Commander, at Schriever AFB, CO, but has always had a deep interest in the paranormal. Frank writes gritty, realistic paranormal fiction that delves into the supernatural, the unexplained, and the metaphysical.

French:

F.P. (Frank) Dorchak a grandi en montagnes d’Adirondack de l’état de New-York. Il s’est occupé de l’université du nord de l’Arizona, dans la hampe de drapeaux, l’Arizona, puis a présenté l’Armée de l’Air des États-Unis. Il a rempli des fonctions d’équipage de combat dans des opérations d’avertissement et de satellite de missile, au cavalier AFS, le Dakota du Nord, et était un contrôleur de mission de GPS et le commandant d’équipage, chez Schriever AFB, Cie, mais a toujours eu un intérêt profond dans le paranormal. Frank écrit la fiction paranormale graveleuse et réaliste qui fouille dans le surnaturel, l’inexpliqué, et le métaphysique.

German:

F.P. (Frank) Dorchak wuchs in der Adirondack-Bergen des Staat New York heran. Er besuchte Nord-Arizona-Universität, im Fahnenmast, Arizona, dann meldete die US-Luftwaffe an. Er führte Kampf-Mannschaftsaufgaben in den Flugwarnungs- und -satellitenoperationen, am Kavalier AFS, North Dakota durch und war- ein GPS-Auftragkontrolleur und Mannschafts-Kommandant, bei Schriever AFB, Co, aber hat immer ein tiefes Interesse an dem paranormalen gehabt. Frank schreibt kiesige, realistische paranormale Erfindung, die in das übernatürliche forscht, das unerklärte und das metaphysische.

Related articles
  • The Uninvited – LIVE at Smashwords! (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
  • The Uninvited (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
  • KA-BAR and The Uninvited – Not For The Squeamish (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
  • Going Indie – What I’ve Learned (So Far) (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)
  • Going Indie – What I’ve Learned (S0 Far) – Part 2 (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)

Filed Under: Fun, Leisure, To Be Human, Writing Tagged With: Adirondack, Amazon, Amazon Kindle, Arizona, E-book, Google Alerts, Indie Publishing, Jim Azevedo, KDP, Nook, North Dakota, Northern Arizona University, Pain, PubIt!, Schriever Air Force Base, self publishing, Smashwords, Susan Brooks

PPWC 2013 Redux

April 22, 2013 by fpdorchak

In truth, I had started this post yesterday, the last day of PPWC 2013. Yeah, I was a little tired, but not too bad, really, better off than I usually am at this point. Truth be told, my neck needed a good crack (it’s better today). This year (as last year) I didn’t pitch any work to anyone—short of showing around the cover I had created for my upcoming supernatural murder mystery e-book (I’ll post the cover art soon—if my schedule of events continue favorably).

But, first, a HEARTY, standing ovational thanks to all who worked their butts off getting this conference up and running! It’s hard work, and it went off exceedingly well! You all done good!

So…what did I do to justify my $395 event fee?

Plenty!

I took in as many sessions as I could over the past three days, focusing on e-book methods and madness (aside: I received many compliments on my cover, created by Karen Duvall—and it really did come out great as a hardcopy!). I filled up the rest of the time with other things, like:

  • How horror bleeds into other genres. Get it? “Bleeds”?
  • How to talk up your book to potential readers (“Hey, do you like to read?”)
  • How to create e-book covers (Mr. Schwartz really liked my soon-to-be-ebook’s cover)
  • How to make the Indie and NY thing work together, and not be an “either/or” proposition
  • A little about how to write psycho characters (cause, like, I really need to understand myself, there—in my personal affairs…)
  • Adapting novels to screenplays, and what that process is (I adapted this mystery of mine into a script years ago—Amber Benson taught this!)
  • How to deal with the sophomoric slump, or “that next book.”
  • How to deal with writer’s block—which was quite enlightening (on several levels) about how different the reasons between guys and girls, when it comes to this—or, maybe, not so much?!
  • What to do once you’re published. Yeah, you’re just getting started….
  • How to write funny, cause Lord knows, I need that, too, in my personal life….

As I’d previously mentioned, I’d also moderated a couple sessions, one read-and-critique session with Kate Testerman and how to write a short story (and send it) in 4 hours, with Zombie-lover DeAnna Knippling (yes, pronounce the “n” in her name). I felt just a little like a fish out of water, moderating, since it’s been about 2 years since I’d done any of that. But it was fun getting back into things.

I also met and talked with all kinds of writers. This time out I was trying to get a little more outside my comfort zone, by sitting at tables for food consumption (during our lunches and dinners) with authors and others not associated with my brand of paranormal fiction bent. I also met and talked with the more “famous-y folk,” listing them in no particular order other than…well…the order I’ve presented below:

  • Terry Banker (always “up,” always friendly, always quick with a handshake and a “How’ve you been, Frank?” He always remembers me!)
  • Becky Clark (now, um, Becky. Yeah. I’m still trying to define, categorize, and define her. Might have to make up a word. I’ll have to get back to you on this one…)
  • Todd Fahnestock (I was so interesting to him, that his eyes glazed over and he had to prop himself up against a wall; that I had him held captive and pinned there, only helped in that endeavor…)
  • Becky Clark (nope…still got nuthin…)
  • Lynda Hilburn (we’ve interacted before by email, but you know you’re in trouble when her first words to you are, “So, what are your hopes and dreams“? Did I mention she’s a practicing and licensed psychotherapist?)
  • Lisa Renee Jones (maaan, I wanna be rich like her!)
  • Becky Clark (okay, okay, got one: she tells cool jokes, like “All work and no play make Lincoln a full-term president” Get it? Think about it…)
  • Aaron Ritchey (this man…he needs his own show; my face and sides still hurt from his EMCEE antics—his 200K “NanoPeakoPikeo” (pardon the spelling, Mr. Ritchey) effort over this weekend; he made me buy his book by being So. Damned. Funny.)
  • Becky Clark (Becky, Becky, Becky…she…she…deifies…Becknification…)
  • Amber Benson (Buffy the Vampire star; yeah, PPWC had her; that’s the kinda clout PPWC wields, my friends; she is so danged sweet!)
  • Barry Eisler (he worked his “Agency Mind Tricks” on me to buy one of his books. Damn him…I-I mean…yes, yes, Mr. Eisler, I…will…buy…all your books….)
  • Becky Clark (okay, she uses lots of K-words, and exaggerates—a lot—but…let me take a picture with her:)

    Becky and Me PPWC 2013
    Becky and Me PPWC 2013

Besides all the famous-y ones, I’ve also met up with those who I many times see only once a year. If that makes any sense. I (hopefully) made some new ones, and met several I’ve only dealt with electronically, so it was really cool to put pixels and faces and names together. Without having to virus check. One person, Lynda Hilburn was particularly funny in our first face-to-face, in that we’d been talking for a while at food time, Friday (you know about my hopes and dreams, which quickly morphed into my issues with cigars and lint—to this day I still don’t know how she did this or where it came from—but in the middle of the ball room banquet hall she had me up on a couch recording our session…interlacing images and analyses from Dante’s Inferno into my hot, steaming tears and mother issues), when she glanced down to my name tag and blurted: “Oh, you’re that Frank Dorchak!” I wasn’t quite sure how to take that, so we explored that for a while…

Lynda Hilburn PPWC 2013
Lynda Hilburn PPWC 2013

To be honest…I almost did not attend this year.

I’m not gonna get into reasons why (Lynda’s writing a paper on that for Psychology Today), but the point is, I did go. I learned so much about the e-books, the latest agent and editor Weltanschauung  (I love that word: Weltanschauung, say it aloud with me…), and I met so many wonderful, friendly, and, yes, even sweet people (and I don’t use “sweet” much, besides “Please pass the sweet…ner“). I give Becky grief, cause, well, she gives it right back. Like a two-by-four to the back of  the head. Lynda—she tells people she’s not good at small talk and gets right to the heart of any conversation in an instant. She’s a wonderful, wonderful woman and an excellent conversationalist. You will never be bored talking with her. Ever. She has so much to say, each of her words so dense with meaning and intent, you’re utterly fascinated by her and where her mind goes—and none of it is small talk. Everyone I met and talked with, they all have their stories, their own lives, and I would never have enjoyed any of it…had I not attended this conference.

So, what’s my fricking point, already?

If you’re a writer, a writer groupie, or simply “just” Becky Clark, and you’re hesitant about attending a writer conference—maybe it’d be your first—afraid of putting yourself out there, meeting others, sitting at lunch and dinner tables with people you do not know—that’s okay to be apprehensive—that which does not kill us, makes us stronger (usually)—but do attend. Do not put it off. Do not skip it. Go and enjoy like-minded people you will not find anywhere else. You won’t regret it. But you won’t know you won’t regret it until you come. To at least one. So, make those plans for 2014. Come out and see us. We don’t bite.

Well, at least the non-vampire/zombie attendees don’t bite….

Related articles
  • The Pikes Peak Writers Conference 2013 (fpdorchak.wordpress.com)

Filed Under: Fun, Writing Tagged With: Aaron Ritchey, Amber Benson, Barry Eisler, Becky Clark, Colorado Springs, Colorado Writer Conferences, E-book, Famous Writers, Lisa Renee Jones, Lynda Hilburn, PPW Pikes Peak Writers, PPWC, Terry Banker, Todd Fahnestock, writing, Writing Conferences

The Pikes Peak Writers Conference 2013

April 18, 2013 by fpdorchak

Pikes Peak sign
Pikes Peak sign (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This weekend, I am—once again—attending the Pikes Peak Writers Conference, also known as the PPWC. It started in 1993, founded by Jimmie H. Butler, and I’ve only missed two, I think. Maybe three?  Have to check that. My wife and I talked about this a week or so ago, but I owe a lot to the PPWC. Much of what I know about writing and those whom I know in the writing world I have met through this conference. My agent is from this conference. Granted, I’ve read a fair amount of craft and writing Zen, have met others from another conference, an out-of-town writer group, but I’ve attended this conference for some 20 years. I’ve learned a lot about not only the writing of fiction, but the marketing and promotion of writing. Studied screenplays and even adapted my supernatural murder mystery into a screenplay. I’ve met a lot of great people, including many well-known authors (have sat by and talked-up Bob Crais [many times, and one of THE COOLEST guys I’ve ever met in the industry, très unassuming], Jeffery Deaver [once], David Morrell, and Joe R. Lansdale [talked with him and drove him to the airport], just off the top of my head). Talking with authors, editors and agents also gives you a feel for who and what these people are. Could you work with them? Do you clash? Sometimes, you’d be surprised at your reactions, your discoveries.

I’ve also presented and helped out at the conferences.

Moderated sessions (am moderating two this year).

Run Gopher…drove people to and from airports…given them tours of the local area…set up and torn down sessions and rooms. Addressed the conference with Jimmie Butler on the passing of a good friend of ours (Moe Morris). Moe and I used to meet at a Village Inn and talk writing. Comment on each other’s work. He was a great guy who actually has an Antarctic glacier named after him (Morris Glacier, which is just below the Queen Alexandria Range, in south central Antarctica, flowing down into the Ross Sea; see photo, below). Moe always joked about having a glacier named after him, because, well, he “wasn’t important enough” for a mountain. He used to be a Navy pilot and flew to Antarctica a lot. He was married to his wife, Virginia, of 57 years, who preceded him in death by only 18 days.

Morris Glacier, Antarctica
Morris Glacier, Antarctica

So, this year, I am again going. I am moderating some sessions, but, not driving people around. I plan on just taking it all in. Getting lost in the writing world, again, for a weekend, meet all my writing friends face-to-face, and once again…dream like crazy. It’s a fun world. Hope to post about it afterwards.

Hope to see you there.

Filed Under: Fun, To Be Human, Writing Tagged With: Antarctica, David Morrell, Dream, Jeffery Deaver, Jimmie H. Butler, Joe R. Lansdale, M. E. Morris, Morris Glacier, Pikes Peak, Pikes Peak Writers Conference, PPWC, Robert Crais, writing

Find Your Soul Paint!

April 15, 2013 by fpdorchak

Once again, my “Renaissance Man” brother has a new set of commercials out. Love the whole “soul paint” concept! He’s the commentating, red-vest-sporting, paint-wearing guy that might remind one of Kevin James. Or Greg Dorchak. And, yes, that was real paint dumped on him. Milk-based paint, not that lead-based stuff. So…okay, maybe he’s not a real tough guy. It was only milk. Based. And he got a rash.

Woo.

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Filed Under: Comedy, Fun, Leisure Tagged With: Ace Hardware, Commerical, Funny, Greg Dorchak, Soul Paint

A Flying Fable, by Samuel Root

March 25, 2013 by fpdorchak

I caught this claymation film, by twelfth-grader, Samuel Root, on Abominations. You gotta watch this—it’s really cool!

A Flying Fable FINISHED VERSION from Samuel Root on Vimeo.

Filed Under: Fun, To Be Human Tagged With: A Flying Fable, Clay animation, Greek gods, Samuel Root

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