F. P. Dorchak

Speculative Fiction (New Weird) Author

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Tail Wagging the Dog?

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Watch Out. We Do Bite Back. (By Sharla Perrin [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons)
Watch Out. We Do Bite Back. (By Sharla Perrin [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons)
It’s really bugged me, this thing that goes: “write what readers want to read.”

It’s also really bugged me this thing agents and editors say: “can you make this into a series?”

You see, as an artist, I take a certain umbrage at being told I have to write what others want to read. To me—to the artist inside me—I want to write what I want to write. What begs to be written by me, the stories that percolate and surface beneath and onto the surface of my mind. For me to have to write what others want to read is rather mercenary, at best. It’s looking at the whole thing from the wrong point of view (in my not-so-humble opinion), at worst.

Do painters and sculptors paint and sculpt what people want them to paint or sculpt?

Oh, and try telling that to a poet!

What happened to writers doing what they wanted to do, creating and expressing their own inner muses and creativity?

What happened to the single-book novel, nay I ask, what is so wrong with the single-book novel?

Anything can be sold. Abso-fricking-lutley anything.

I don’t want to write about vampires (without the “-yres”), I don’t want to write fantasy. I don’t want to write romance. I don’t want to be easily pigeonholed. I want my work to bridge genres. In and of themselves, there’s nothing wrong with any of these genres…except that there are too many of “the same” IMNSHO. I’m all for writers being successful, and feel there is room for all of us, but I am not for crappy writing being thrown around and slapped between two covers just because it will sell. I’m not for tritely cloned stories. And I feel for the writers who partake in this, because they feel they have to, to make it in this biz. If they want to do it, then that’s all them, more power to them, but, please, don’t do it just to cow to the Powers of Publishing. I have tied to read a lot of mid-list books a couple years ago, and found I just couldn’t do it. To me, and for the most part, the stories were tired and flat. Uninteresting. Trite. Poorly written.

Yet they sell.

Now, one or two were well-written, but the stories just didn’t interest me. Okay, that’s fair. I’m not everybody, and everybody’s not me, and my work isn’t for everybody. Different tastes keep life interesting. But, please, don’t coerce, intimidate, nor cajole me into writing like some other story out there just because some people are buying that particular “thing.” Fine, compare me, if it’s complimentary, but don’t force me into something I’m not.

Please, allow me (and others like me) to write what we want to write. If you don’t like it, fine, don’t read it, don’t take me on—but do not not take me on just because I’m not like what’s already out there, because it’d take just a little more Brain Power on your part to market and promote me. For chrissakes, people have told me my work has given them nightmares! You don’t get nightmares from stuff that doesn’t interest you, doesn’t bother you, doesn’t affect you in some, moving, profound, way! So, I’m betting that someone out there will like it. I don’t say this out of ego…I say this out of understanding humanity. If I like something, chances are someone out there will also like it. We’re really all quite similar in how we operate as Humans. If someone likes something, chances are so will others of our kind. I’ve written and published three novels. With one exception I can think of, the reviews are all favorable. So, I know I can write something–stand-alone books,  no less!—others would find interesting enough to read and review (and I thank all who took the time to review my books!)…have nightmares over!

It’s not that I’m so much against the Publishing World…as I am against the mindsets that drive it. I love most of the editors I’ve met, and some of the agents. I’d love to be able to work with a traditional publisher, regain agenting. I’m just asking for the mindsets to change…just a little. Become more open, more humane.

So, please, allow us to express our own unique creativity. Don’t force us into boxes that don’t exist. It is not a case of getting us to be more salable. You may think it is, but it’s not. You may have created a business out of distribution, but that doesn’t make it right that you impose your ways on us. You should work with us, as we are [trying to] work with you. You may feel like you have (or have had) the power to make or break us, but whether or not that may be the commercial case, that should not be the Human Way. You should not try to screw us over with your greedy, author unfriendly contracts. If you had no authors, you’d have no business. No power. If it wasn’t for us, you’d be nothing, and you’re power-purse-strings approach seems to squelch that for most, who succumb to your whims, but it doesn’t make what you’re doing right. This should be about distributing the work that we love and create—yes, with whatever needed improvements and polish that comes from professional editing—but, letting us do our job of writing what we love to write, and you do your job of distributing our work.

Money will be made.

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Going Indie—What I’ve Learned (So Far)—Part 9

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Pay or Die! By W. M. Goodes (Nye, Bill: “Bill Nye’s History of England” (1900)) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons.
Pay or Die! By W. M. Goodes (Nye, Bill: “Bill Nye’s History of England” (1900)) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons.
Taxes.

Note to IRS: Writing is NOT a hobby to me.

We had our taxes done this past week, and, once again, I got hit with the standard spiel about “Hobby/Loss” rules. About my pitiful pittance of so-called “profit.”

Why?

Because I’d spent a couple thou on releasing two novels of mine last year (not counting my normal writing expenses) and hadn’t made a profit. Though I was physically and mentally exhausted at this tax meeting, and was, admittedly, a bit angry with the same (insert favorite expletive) admonishment I’ve been receiving since about 1987, I don’t really hold it against the man reading me the riot act. He’s just part of the process and covering his ass. Making sure I understand the position of my ass. I get that. But I was tired. Even a little annoyed at myself for how much I’d spent and at the small return—especially once I saw how many e-books were downloaded and no associated reviews or whatever (even bad ones) with all those downloads. Free downloads. Sure, Mark Coker (whom I’ve met and talked with—and a super, super GREAT guy) and the rest say that’s that M.O. for Indie publishing—giveaways. They will earn themselves out sometime…near or far future…but still…I was miffed. I gave away hundreds of books, and figured they were all languishing in the dark, dank corners of hundreds of harddrives, ignored and never to be read. Bit fillers.

Okay, I’m projecting and generalizing, there, because I was tired, but that was what was going through my mind. I can’t assume to know everyone’s mindset when they acquired my work, but I was happy that so many had acquired them. At that point, I just wasn’t happy with the lack of the almighty frigging important profits…and I was unhappy with the mere thought of profits!

Profits.

You see, folks, taxes bring out the weak links in businesses. The whole idea behind businesses, we are taught, is to make money. Not that we make the world a better place by the businesses we bring into existence, not that we’re out to help others. Not any other thing—

Profits.

Yes, that severely chafes me. Because every year I have to put my Business Hat on and talk money.

Artists don’t like talking money.

We don’t do what we do for the money. But…if we want to live…we have to make some sort of remuneration. Many of us have other jobs that do make money…but all of us, well nearly all of us—I don’t presume to know everyone’s motives—would love to be able to do the one thing that keeps us going…that feeds our souls…and make a living at that.

The IRS.

But this conflicts with IRS rules and regulations, if you’re making any money. Cause, if you make money, you must pay the piper. I don’t mind paying the piper. The piper is fine. We live in a great country, and somehow, we have to pay for things in this great country, and taxes are our mechanism. Live with it. Get over it. Taxes are how we get to reap the benefits of living where we live…whether or not they are properly managed is a whole ‘nother, exhausting argument.

I don’t want to bore with all the intricacies of the IRS Code, because I don’t know it and would have to research it, and, frankly, I’d rather force-vomit-up repeatedly the entire day than have to read that stuff, but here are some case studies on the matter of writers and taxes. The basic takeaways are:

  1. Treat writing like a business.
  2. Must prove the intent of making a profit in the business of writing.
  3. If no profit is made, show that it was due to circumstances beyond one’s control, like customary business risks, casualty losses, or depressed market conditions.

Now, I’m oversimplifying, and there are many and various methods to those steps, and I’m not gonna get into them, because I’m not legal counsel and the tax law is far more complex than it needs to be, but check out that link for interesting case studies and consult your tax folk. It’s interesting that there are cases where the IRS deemed a writer as not a writer-for-profit, the case then taken to court, and the court decreed that the writer was a writer-for-profit. So, all is not lost. One of the other things in those cases, was that the writer had to prove that their not making a profit was due to the third item above. In any event, nothing’s easy, nothing’s a given. You have to make every effort to treat your writing like the business it is, if you want to claim anything on your taxes and not use hobby/loss rules. There’s always a chance you could get audited, but, if you do, you can still “win,” as long as all your ducks are in a row.

Okay, so in the interests of showing how business-like I am, here is what I’m doing, plus/minus:

  1. I get up every damn day (twice on Sundays…okay, also Mondays-Saturdays, since I appear to have RLS), whether or not I feel like doing it, and write something. Promote.
  2. I log all my time on the computer for all my writing time.
  3. I log my submissions and important events in a logbook.
  4. I spreadsheet all expenses, income, and mileage.
  5. I spreadsheet inventory.
  6. I blog.
  7. I interact on social media (WordPress, Twitter, Pinterest, FB, AboutMe, LinkedIn the occasional online forum, like, currently, an Amazon forum).
  8. I push the Indie Publishing agenda.
  9. I interview on traditional and Internet radio.
  10. I try to get any gig where I can to advance the Indie Agenda, and get my work out there.
  11. I annoy and guilt others into buying my book, when severely hopped up on caffeine—which, I’m finding, I seem to need more of as I get older. Iced Tea doesn’t seem to be cutting it any longer (see RLS, above). I do same, to get readers to review my work. Note: why do I do this? I do it so others will see how much other readers have liked the book, so they, too, might like it and buy. If this was just for a frigging hobby, I could give a shit if someone liked it or not (as in I’d be doing it for my benefit and relaxation and it doesn’t matter if you like or don’t like that…) and wouldn’t keep embarrassing myself into asking readers for reviews—even short ones. My ego does not need stroking (some might say it strokes itself…). But, again, I’d really like to make a living off this stuff, so….
  12. I try to get writer conference sessions.
  13. I’ve submitted my work for official reviews, like The Midwest Book Review and BookReview.com (whose link, curiously, seems to be down, since I sent my work to them…).
  14. Am constantly prowling (yes, prowling) for any opportunity to further advance the cause of my work (note, I didn’t say me…my work…). I’ve even got my dad trying to sell my books in upstate New York. Any of you can also help out by trying to get me in anywhere you’d think I’d fit (note, I’m not 165 lbs…am currently about 200, so keep that in mind). Get me a radio phoner interview (where I’d call in, versus showing up in-studio), invite me to your library or writer/reader groups, if in driving distance (or “they” pay for my airfare and hotel…  :-] ), send links to my work all over the planet, talk my books up whenever you can, interview me for your blog. I’m a fun guy. Witty sometimes. See, I am prowling, even trolling (note double entendre, which, originally, was “double entente,” c. 1670s)…

Thing is, I’m no longer 23 and can’t do 20-hour days anymore. I do do (go on, laugh, it’s allowed) 18-hour days, though. I have a day job that’s frequently been more than just a day job and do get quite exhausted by day’s end, so that curtails evening events (frequent ones, anyway) at the moment. I also workout after work. That takes a couple hours. Staying fit is important on many levels, but to Mr. and Mrs. IRS that should mean it makes me a lean-mean-profit-making-machine. Or tries to, anyway, but, given the glutted publishing market and “customary business risks, casualty losses, or depressed market conditions,” it’s hard to break into and make a profit in the publishing world. But I’m still in there swinging. Because I lift weights. Cardio give me longevity.

Now, yes, some of this all might sound decidedly mercenary (in actuality, reviews are not just about the promotion to me, I’m truly curious about how people interpret and feel about the stories; I’ve written them to touch and impact in some way, even inform…), take some of the romanticism out of us writers, but, sigh, we’re just trying to make a living. We’re not egotistical—most of us don’t even like the limelight—but we have a driving need to write. To convey stories we hope others might find fun or interesting. What do each of you do to stay employed? How do each of you sell yourselves? It’s a true pity so much focus is put on profitability, but you have to also look at it from the IRS’s point of view: people cheat. Once you understand that, everything else falls into place.

Don’t hate the writer. We just wanna write…and without us, you don’t have anything to read.

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A HUGE Thank You To All of You!

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By Erkan Yilmaz (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
By Erkan Yilmaz (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
I just wanted to give a heartfelt THANK YOU to everyone who has taken the time to visit my sites (here, Facebook,  About Me, LinkedIn, Twitter, Pinterest), read and review my work, or to mention any of this to another. In interacting with me on social media (oy, and trying to stay up and current on all this social media while working a day job, trying to WRITE, living a regular life…?!).

It is still weird to me, as long as I’ve been writing, the whole promotion thing…focusing attention on me…so, I look at it more as focusing attention on the work (I even have a hard time saying my work!). The books, the stories. These are things people like me like to say we “channel,” or sculpt into existence. Like a wood carver “discovering” the shape that “forms” out of tree trunks or limbs. We shape things. I suppose we all do it for different reasons, like entertainment, enlightenment, cathartic release. I’m sure you’ve heard it all before. Whatever the reason, we just do it. It’s what’s “built” into us…mechanics are drawn to oil and machinery and athletes to their sports. We’re all drawn to something in our lives. Writers/artists are no different. But in our case, without you, we’re only halfway there. To write is to be read, and I am ever grateful for you being on our team, because it is a team.

I appreciate that you’ve taken time out of your day to spend a little of it with people like me to read, comment, discuss, commiserate, what-have-you. There’s a lot going on out there, and I’m very appreciative of everyone’s time and efforts, and I periodically like to let you all know that I try to take very little for granted…especially my readers and support group—YOU.

Thank you!

Going Indie—What I’ve Learned (So Far)—Part 8

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Busy
I Can DO This! (Busy. Photo credit: AJC1)

Wow, could things get any busier?

I have been pushing more of the social media thing, the past month or two, at the expense of working on my manuscript-in-progress, Psychic, and kinda “burning the candle at both ends.” It gets exhausting…but cool to find new avenues, like iAuthor. I’m even considering starting up a quarterly newsletter, but when will that happen, since I’m stuck on the initial insert the subscription widget onto my blog site part! No, I’m not all that technically inept, but it seems as though some crucial “it’s easy” step or two is missing from the WordPress instructions. I’ve e-mail their Help depot.

Okay, since my last post on this topic, here are some more things I’ve learned on my adventure of “Going Indie”:

  1. Selecting ISBNs on CreateSpace.  Be careful with you go in and select which type of ISBN you want for your book, and whichever one you do choose, ALWAYS also select the expanded distribution. Read the different types very carefully before selecting, because once you select, you cannot change the ISBN—unless you totally delete your book’s account and start over. I recommend the custom ISBN option for $10 and then get a graphic designer (which will cost you, of course, but is well worth it!), like Lon Kirschner, to design a “faux imprint” for you to have on the bottom edge of your cover, like my Wailing Loon. It looks cool and gives you a brand for your work, other than the generic “CreateSpace.” You can display a little more your own creativity of “who you and your books are.”
  2. Changes To Your CreateSpace file. I found I had to go back into The Uninvited to add some missing front matter. It’s kinda “scary,” doing this, because you really don’t want to F-up your already nitpicked and edited file, but it’s easy to do. You simply select the interior or cover portion of your file, under “Setup,” on your Project Homepage for the book in question, and on the next page, you’ll see a place that says “Make Changes,” and go from there. You don’t have to change anything other than what you need to change, like, for me, the front matter blurbs. You can just “Next” on through the other stuff. Just be careful to not touch anything else. And for any proofing, you can have an actual “proof” copy of the book sent to you (versus doing this all online, for free), though you have to pay for it (like $5, plus shipping), and on the back page of the book is stamped “Proof.”
  3. Interested in signed copies? I decided to get that PO box, so I could mail stuff back and forth to any readers out there. I’ve posted the address about, but it’s F. P. Dorchak, P. O. Box 49393, Colorado Springs, Colorado 80949. The Post Office says you can do a 3-month version, but you have to also get the automatic renewal, which makes zero sense, because that makes the term 6 months. So, really, the lowest amount of time you can get a PO box for is 6 months. That’s government reasoning for you. But it’s cheap (mine is $39). If you get something larger than the box you have, they just give you a key to a larger box, for no charge.
  4. Chain Reviews and World Domination. I put out there that if anyone was interested in reviewing my books, I’d send free, autographed copies. The first 5 per book would get a free book. Offer still stands.
  5. Book Review Outlets. I’m looking into these, you know, what with all the free time I have. Check these out.
  6. Facebook. So far, this is a bust. No more begging from me! And still no “FB Superpowers,” i.e., I still cannot “Like” other pages or save the world. But, not giving up, cause it’s still early, but, feel free to drop by my FB page. Thanks!
  7. Newsletters. Found a great couple of Writers in The Storm links for newsletter info. Thanks, WITS! Thought I’d do this this year, but may have to wait until next year.
  8. Word of mouth. This is where I get lots of comments from people, either by e-mail or through my wife. This is where people rave about my work. Not Facebook (well, at least not so far…). And, of course, I have some “virtual friends” with which I routinely interact, and they’re very supportive (thanks, again, folks)! But, word of mouth seems like the biggest factor in my marketing and promotion. It’s everyone one of you, out there, reading my work and talking about it. Telling others. I hope you will also write an online review (e.g., here und here) at your favorite outlets, too. Please. Thanks!
  9. iAuthor. Found a new overseas outlet, out of the U.K., called iAuthor, so I added The Uninvited and ERO to this site (Sleepwalkers doesn’t have a HighDef cover file, so I’m told by the site it most likely wouldn’t be allowed, because it would degrade he overall quality of the images). It’s free for authors. But…the site seems to have issues during the “height of the day” in loading and such (just now, the site didn’t load right; it should display tons of book covers). I had to do my uploads in the early hours of the morning (i.e., 3 a.m.) before I got them to work, so be advised.

That’s all I have for this year, for my ongoing “Going Indie” adventure. As always, thanks for stopping by, and have a Happy Holiday Season, in whatever way you choose to celebrate (or, uh, not celebrate…) it!

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Chain Reviews and World Conquest

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ERO (© 2013, F. P. Dorchak and Lon Kirschner)
ERO (© 2013, F. P. Dorchak and Lon Kirschner)

I had this idea while walking, yesterday, in the quickly growing darkness of our recent Daily Saving (not “savings“) time change:

Chain reviews.

Oh, and World Conquest.

I did an Internet search and didn’t find the term “chain reviews” there, so I’m going on record as coining the term, though I’m sure someone’s already thought of this. But, if not, here’s the idea:

I give you a free (signed) copy of one of my books (ERO  or The Uninvited) and you review it…and it can be a

The Uninvited (© F. P. Dorchak and Duvall Design)
The Uninvited (© F. P. Dorchak and Duvall Design)

single sentence or as long as you want, but, you have post it online (or elsewhere if you have methods…). Now, you can post it wherever you like, but I’d at least hope it would be on Amazon and Barnes and Noble—but, as I said, I’m not mandating where it has to be, just that it be posted somewhere for others to find it. Hopefully you would also send me back a link to said review, but I’m not gonna mandate that either. I am just looking to get reviews and put them “out there.” Then, according to my crazy scheme (henceforth herein referred to as “Evil Plan”), you (temporarily!) give your copy of the book to one other person, and have them do the same. When they’re done, they return your book back to you. That’s where the “chaining” comes in. Once they’ve posted their review, if they’d like their own signed copy, they can contact me for their own copy—or a copy of a different book of mine. So, theoretically, this would go on ad infinitum…but, I can’t give away free books ad infinitum, so I’ll have to limit this to the one “other person.” I’d like to see if this Evil Plan of mine can gain any traction and become “a thing.”

So. For now.  I’m limiting this “special offer” (aka “Evil Plan” or “Crazy Scheme”) to the first five who contact me for ERO and the first five who contact me for The Uninvited, and see how this goes. If it my Evil Plan “comes together,” I’ll consider additional campaigns—I mean installments (after all, all Evil Plans are to Take Over The World, and mine is no different…). Ignore that man behind the curtain, over there….

Oh, and it’s purely coincidental that my Evil Plan is initiated in November. Coincidence. Nothing more.

To get said free-and-signed-book, contact me at “fpdorchak at fpdorchak dot com” (use approved e-mail format, as in “blahblah@blahblah.com”).

Fine Print (read very fast and run all words together in one breath!): I have a limited supply of books to give away, so I cannot give any additional “chained” reviewers beyond the second reviewer, also known as the “book borrower,” free copies at this time. But stay tuned! And if anyone has already purchased a copy of any of my books, and would like it signed, also contact me at the above e-mail address, and I will autograph my Evil Signature upon said title page. With the date of said Evil Act. There’s nothing legal about any of this, just an Evil Plan hatched in the deranged mind of a deranged author trying to get by. Oh, and THANKS! :-]

You can use any book images you want from my posts.

My Favorite Horror Novels

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Please, Let Me Show You A Few Of My Favorite Things.... (Nosferatu Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Please, Let Me Show You A Few Of My Favorite Things…. (Nosferatu Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Since I listed my favorite horror films, I decided, why not list my favorite horror novels? I don’t consider myself any kind of “well read”; Most of my recent reading has been for my own novel research, and since I no longer write a lot of strict “horror,” I don’t read a lot of it. I will state this, however: I love [most of] Stephen King’s horror/supernatural work.

Now, having said that, there was one book of his I’d started and never finished, because I found it to be so mean-spirited I just didn’t want to read any further. That book was Full Dark, No Stars. Loved the title, but didn’t want to be subjected to what I was reading. It was too real. Too nasty. Mean. It surprised me that he’d written such a novel. It was about revenge and the nastiness that can reside inside people. As one Amazon reviewer said, it was “just gratuitous nastiness.” And that so many people loved this book is kinda unnerving. Really, people love reading about that kind of stuff? Granted, this question can be levied at horror fiction, in general, but holy shit. At least to me, reading horror (and supernatural) fiction is about a release from the real world, of entering a fantastic world of The Weird…about experiencing something that engages the fright mode in each of us—but in a comfortable way. Full Dark, No Stars, however, was like reading real accounts of Mankind’s Inhumanity To Mankind. Or getting inside the heads of these people who commit crimes, and that simply doesn’t interest me. I don’t read true crime and have no interest in getting inside any mean-minded individual’s heads. I don’t enjoy that kind of material…it’s not a release, not cathartic, and certainly not entertainment for me. Sometimes fiction can be too real, and while I applaud King’s ability to write like no other (and incite these feeling in me with his work), that doesn’t mean that I have to like everything he writes (same goes with any writer’s efforts—including mine).

So I returned the book, unfinished.

On to more fun reading!

Below is a list of those novels (no anthologies) I’ve read over the years and really enjoyed. Most I have not read again since the first read, sometimes, years and years ago, but, again, like the movies I’d written about, they stuck with me for some reason. In once case, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, I’d read it four times, and still love it. There are also several books out there from King and some others, like Anne Rice and Susan Hill’s The Woman in Black, I have yet to get to, so they may yet be included in future editions of this list….

And given my one extreme, with Full Dark, No Stars, I can honestly say that my other extreme, my most favorite horror read of all time (so far), was Pet Sematary. When I read it, it was the scariest horror novel I’d ever read, and everything I’ve read since, I measure against it! Nothing has come close…but again, I don’t consider myself “well read.” But, the feeling of utter creepiness was and still has stuck with me as the best all-time creepiness I’ve ever read. Dracula would tally in as the most atmospheric novel.

So, feel free to check out any of these great reads—and suggest some of your own favorites—maybe I’ve read them and simply forgotten about them, as I did with The Ring, in my favorite horror movies (I have a saying that “I’ve forgotten more than I ever knew…”)!

Now…enter my library…if you dare….

Bag of Bones

Day of the Triffids

Dracula

Ghost Story

If You Could See Me Now

Interview With A Vampire

It

Nosferatu

Pet Sematary

‘Salem’s Lot

The Haunted

The Other

The Shining

Werewolf of Ponkert